I love Dax Shepherd. LOVE. I love him for several reasons – he’s rugged, funny, manly, drives a gigantic bus, rides dirt bikes, love cars, Michigander (I truly have not met someone from Michigan I didn’t like), he’s married to one of the greatest human beings on the planet, loves his daughters so much, successful, ambitious, willing to try new things, willing to fail, etc. Finally, the fact that he’s tall and handsome helps. Good thing he’s not dark, or it would be a done deal.

But what really makes him special is his authenticity. He’s raw. He loves to talk, debate, and get into the messiness of life. He looks at things from both sides of the coin but remains firm in the things he’s firm about, without being an asshole. 

Grow, grow where you are
Anchor your roots underneath
Doubt your doubt
And believe your beliefs

Switchfoot. “Ode to Chin”

I’ve been an “armcherry” as they call them for the last five years or so. An armcherry is a devoted fan of his podcast Armchair Expert, where he and his close friend, Monica, interview celebrities and field experts. Here is how he describes himself and the podcast: 

“Hi, I’m Dax Shepard, and I love talking to people. I am endlessly fascinated by the messiness of being human, and I find people who are vulnerable and honest about their struggles and shortcomings to be incredibly sexy. I invite you to join me as I explore other people’s stories. We will celebrate, above all, the challenges and setbacks that ultimately lead to growth and betterment.”

The episode I’m currently watching (they started recording a few months ago) is with Brad Pitt. This is a big get…not only for Dax, but for anyone who loves pop culture or grew up with a Meet Joe Black movie advertisement ripped out of a magazine and tucked into the clear plastic sleeve of their 7th-grade humanities binder (guilty). 

I’m only 7 minutes in, but they start talking about when they met through a men’s support group (read AA). As if Brad Pitt could be any sexier…I’m now learning that he, like Dax, is sober.

As soon as I heard this, my love for Brad Pitt also increased in value like the rise in bitcoin from 2013 to 2025. (That’s a 790,756.25% all-time increase for you math enthusiasts.)

Last summer, a rising college senior with tons of promise asked my good friend Claire what she should look for in a spouse. Her short answer is as follows:

• ability to deny oneself
• be self-sacrificing
• humility 

For men to exhibit restraint, not because they are forced, but because they choose not to, is incredibly admirable. And by restraint, I mean self-control.

In contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is 
love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, 
generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, 
self-control. 
Against such, there is no law. 

Galatians 5:22-23

Sobriety usually implies a journey – likely, something difficult and maybe even dangerous or destructive. It represents resilience and conquering something that is getting in the way of living a healthy and whole life. It requires someone to do the work, and often, that work is harder than not drinking. Looking inward and deeper to uncover why there is a hold on us.

While I was writing this post, I got a message on Slack with this YouTube video titled This family produced 7 MURDERERS…😲🚫. (Worth the 75 seconds to watch it.) This striking comparison reinforced that self-control, selflessness, and (very likely) humility are the components to thrive in work, love, and families. I immediately sent it to my brother, a father of 5, and who in turn immediately shared a song called “I’ve got to get sober” – further affirming the challenge and chokehold drinking can have. I have the utmost respect, admiration, and appreciation for men and women who do the work to live a full, healthy, and hopeful life. Here’s the chorus:

I’ve gotta get sober, I’ve gotta start livin’ right
And I don’t know how it’s gonna go
But it ain’t gon’ happen tonight
So pour ’em down strong ’til I drown
And if I wake up tomorrow when that sun comes back around
I’ll be wishin’ I was sober

Oliver Anthony Music. “I’ve Got to Get Sober”

P.S. If you’d like to hear me fan girl to the man himself (Dax, not Brad), check out the last story on the playlist and skip to 28:00.